The Abuse Survivor’s Toolbox
Mariela Haack, Author
If you were referred here by Kate Mageau and/or Empowering Therapy, these resources are free for you to use. Take what helps. Skip what doesn’t.
Welcome — These resources are here to support your therapy process
You do not need to create an account or provide an email address.
You can download anything on this page and use only what feels helpful right now.
These tools are designed to support the work you are already doing in therapy by helping you organize thoughts, track patterns, and prepare for conversations with your clinician.
There is no right order, no timeline, and no pressure.
Take what helps. Skip what doesn’t.
🌿 Start Here: Calm Before Clarity, a 10-Minute Reset When Everything Feels Urgent
🌿 Start Here: Calm Before Clarity — a 10-Minute Reset When Everything Feels Urgent
If your thoughts are racing or you feel stuck, begin with this short grounding and reset tool.
It is designed to help slow your nervous system and thinking enough to make the next small decision — not all the decisions at once.
Many people use this between sessions to stabilize and return to a more regulated state.The Clarity Toolkit — Making Sense of What’s Happening
This toolkit helps you organize information, timelines, and decisions when things feel chaotic or overwhelming.
People use it to:
sort through what actually happened
clarify priorities and options
prepare for conversations with advocates, attorneys, or support services
👉 Download: Calm Before Clarity
🌿 Personal Safety Snapshot — A Simple Scan for Awareness and Clarity
Once your nervous system begins to settle, the next step is gentle awareness.
Many destabilizing or unsafe situations do not feel obviously dangerous. They often feel confusing, inconsistent, or unpredictable. This short structured scan helps you notice patterns, risk, and areas of support in a calm and grounded way.
People use this tool to:
step back and see the full picture more clearly
notice patterns that may be difficult to recognize in the moment
reduce overwhelm by organizing thoughts
prepare for conversations with a therapist, advocate, or trusted support person
begin thinking about safety and stability without pressure
Many clients find this especially helpful between therapy sessions, as a way to reflect and organize their thoughts at their own pace.
The Clarity Toolkit- Making Sense of What’s Happening
This toolkit helps you organize information, timelines, and decisions when things feel chaotic or overwhelming.
People use it to:
sort through what actually happened
clarify priorities and options
identify patterns and triggers
prepare for conversations in therapy
bring structure to difficult or confusing situations
👉 Download: Clarity Toolkit (Free for clients referred by Dr. Kate Mageau)
The Safety Toolkit — Planning When Things Feel Unstable
This toolkit focuses on safety, risk, and practical next-step planning when someone else’s behavior feels unpredictable or destabilizing.
People use it to:
think through safety risks
plan boundaries, contact, or exit strategies
identify stabilizing supports
prepare for transitions or difficult decisions
👉 Download: Safety Toolkit (Free for clients referred by Kate Mageau or Empowering Therapy)
🌿 The Agency Toolkit — Reclaiming Choice and Forward Movement
Once you begin to feel more stable and understand your situation more clearly, the next step is rebuilding a sense of agency and control.
This toolkit focuses on helping you move from survival and reaction toward intentional, values-based decision-making. It is designed for moments when you are no longer in immediate crisis but still feel stuck, uncertain, or hesitant to take the next step.
People use this tool to:
clarify personal values and long-term priorities
rebuild confidence in their own judgment
explore options without pressure
move from feeling “trapped” to identifying realistic choices
strengthen boundaries and self-trust
develop a sustainable path forward at their own pace
Many clients use these exercises together with therapy to support gradual, thoughtful change rather than rushed or reactive decisions.
👉 Download: Agency Toolkit (Free for clients referred by Kate Mageau or Empowering Therapy)
Using these tools in therapy
Many people find it helpful to bring completed worksheets or notes from these tools into sessions.
They can support:
clearer communication
emotional regulation
structured decision-making
continuity between sessions
You do not have to work through everything alone or all at once.
Important support note
These tools are designed to support your reflection, planning, and decision-making.
They are not a replacement for therapy, crisis services, legal advice, or advocacy support.
If you are in immediate danger, contact local emergency services or a domestic violence hotline in your area.
If you were referred by Dr. Mangeau, you can also reach out to her directly for support.
If you found these tools helpful and want to explore additional resources later, you can learn more at abusesurvivorstoolbox.com.